View Full Version : You know you're getting older when:
Dragynphyre
12-10-04, 07:31 AM
1. You attend your company's holiday party and are walking around wishing everyone holiday greetings - when you are ambushed by your younger colleagues and foolishly allow them to drag you out on the dance floor... when you wake up in the morning and try to get out of bed, it feels like someone's injected 100% capsaicin oil directly into the joints and bashed both of them with a sledgehammer for good measure...
Feel free to add to the list!
When your friend shows off their new Mustang, and you think to yourself. "You know, for that kind of Money, I'd rather have a Minivan instead."
You hire your daughter to be the receptionist in your company - full time.
Brelkor
12-10-04, 09:45 AM
"You start looking at sixteen year old girls and think 'Can she babysit?'"
Oh, that one hits too clsoe to home. I actually have a Kid from Church coming over to babysit my son tonight... And yeah, She's 16.
When family members half your age announce they're pregnant. :(
You have to write a christmas gift list and when nothing you'd want pops into your head you write down socks.
Yeah, I'm the same way.
Anything I would want for Christmas is either Too expensive for a gift, soemthing that I'd want to pick out personally (i.e. computer components) or else I already have it.
Brelkor
12-10-04, 11:13 AM
I stop buying computer games, books, and other geeky material in november and put it on my xmas list. ;)
Telurinon
12-10-04, 12:58 PM
I stop buying computer games, books, and other geeky material in november and put it on my xmas list. ;)
Ditto! :)
You have to write a christmas gift list and when nothing you'd want pops into your head you write down socks.
I'm 17, and my Christmas list is socks.
No matter what age or gender you are... you cannot possibly have too many socks.
Hair starts sprouting from the strangest places. :blink
When you stop wearing boxers because they're "cool" and wear boxer briefs because they're far more comfortable. :P
Biggwin
12-10-04, 01:38 PM
Haha, Tooo funny I have clothes on my list. I am at the point where I have most the toys I want and the ones I still want cost way to much for a gift!
It really hit home this year when my 7 year old did his school christmas play and it reminded me how quick he was growing up and how old that made me!
freonsmurf
12-10-04, 01:52 PM
When your friends are over 30 and start talking about having their first kid and you are 29 like, "OH **** 30 is around the ****ing corner!"
Dragynphyre
12-13-04, 07:08 AM
I have like 30 pairs of socks at this point - most of them comfy white cotton, like almost every pair of panties I own. But gravity is a bitch - I've switched to the more uncomfortable underwire bras because they have more support.
Cortadillo
12-13-04, 07:23 AM
When you hear a new slang word for the first time and think "God, that just sounds plain stupid." You then find out that slang word is old :( (I live in NYC so these things change often!!)
When you're listening to the radio loving every song they're putting on thinking how much better it is than the majority of newer stuff and then you hear them say "Old School at Noon". (Damn you Hot97!!!)
When you decide to not go to McDonalds, Taco Hell or some other fast food joint because you know you won't get around to working it off.
Everytime my wife introduces me as her husband. Still freaks me out.
When you go to a club or a strip bar and think "I don't think the cover for this place is in the budget"
When a hot young waitress calls you "sir."
/sigh
:|
Dragynphyre
12-13-04, 08:19 AM
When you decide to not go to McDonalds, Taco Hell or some other fast food joint because you know you won't get around to working it off.
Or when you pass up those places because everything on the menu gives you indigestion... now you know why your mom never actually ate with you when she took you to Burger King.
I think it's more due to the fact it's tasteless shite .... maybe a big thing of getting old is you tastebuds get better and you enjoy a wide variety of tastes and flavours instead of just lard & sugar.
When family members half your age announce they're pregnant. :(
In this day and age though you could be 24 and have that happen. :hmph
How about when you sleep wrong then have to spend the next three days walking around crouched over and seriously think about getting a cane so your stomach muscles could get some rest.
:: rubs back :: :frown
Hemorrhoids. That was a thoroughly unpleasant week, and a major blow to the swinging bachelor lifestyle I always imagined I could have had.
*wanders off to eat some fiber*
When you stop wearing boxers because they're "cool" and wear boxer briefs because they're far more comfortable. :P
Or when your wife buys you new boxers not because they are "cool" (Stylish), but because they allow your dangly bits to be cool (temperature wise) for increased chances of concieving a kid?
That Biological clock ticks loudly...
nekoken
12-14-04, 07:08 PM
When you stop wearing boxers because they're "cool" and wear boxer briefs because they're far more comfortable. :P
I don't even know the difference between boxers and boxer briefs.
...I'm really not sure what that says.
Kaielen
12-15-04, 08:39 AM
When you see an incredibly attractive woman in a very short miniskirt and your first thought is, "That is NOT work appropriate."
When you stop wearing boxers because they're "cool" and wear boxer briefs because they're far more comfortable. :P
Or when your wife buys you new boxers not because they are "cool" (Stylish), but because they allow your dangly bits to be cool (temperature wise) for increased chances of concieving a kid?
That Biological clock ticks loudly...
I find when you don't want a kid you will get her pregnant faster...so just pretend you guys don't want a kid and she will get pregnant it never fails.
When asked what you want for Christmas, you begin your response with "I need" instead of "I want."
/grumble
When you stop wearing boxers because they're "cool" and wear boxer briefs because they're far more comfortable. :P
Or when your wife buys you new boxers not because they are "cool" (Stylish), but because they allow your dangly bits to be cool (temperature wise) for increased chances of concieving a kid?
That Biological clock ticks loudly...
I find when you don't want a kid you will get her pregnant faster...so just pretend you guys don't want a kid and she will get pregnant it never fails.
Well, from what I've seen with my Family... If you are utterly irresponsible, and in no way (Emotionally, Financially, etc.) ready to raise a child? You will be able to get pregnant/cause pregnancy by merely being in the same room with someone of the opposite sex. The ones who are actually ready and willing are the ones who can't.
Dragynphyre
12-30-04, 05:58 AM
When asked what you want for Christmas, you begin your response with "I need" instead of "I want."
/grumble
:rofl I absolutely did that this year!!
"I could use a..."
That's it. I'm turning into my mom. There's no stopping it.
Well, from what I've seen with my Family... If you are utterly irresponsible, and in no way (Emotionally, Financially, etc.) ready to raise a child? You will be able to get pregnant/cause pregnancy by merely being in the same room with someone of the opposite sex. The ones who are actually ready and willing are the ones who can't.
Yup that was my point exactly...Seriously though I don't see how if you just nail it a few times a day for a month a girl WONT get pregnant.
From what I understand having sex more than once every 2 days lowers your sperm count, in turn lowering your chance of conceiving a child.
Oh no, I am 21 and turning old already!
Well, from what I've seen with my Family... If you are utterly irresponsible, and in no way (Emotionally, Financially, etc.) ready to raise a child? You will be able to get pregnant/cause pregnancy by merely being in the same room with someone of the opposite sex. The ones who are actually ready and willing are the ones who can't.
Yup that was my point exactly...Seriously though I don't see how if you just nail it a few times a day for a month a girl WONT get pregnant.
This reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Homer is trying to help Apu and Manjula get pregnant and he has them role play as a cheerleader and letterman...ahh good times....
Dragynphyre
12-31-04, 05:48 AM
... you hear one of your favorite Billy Joel songs on the "Oldies" station. When I was a kid, "Oldies" meant the rock n' roll songs from the 50's and 60's ONLY!
Billy Joel? Even Billy IDOL is "oldies" now =(.
Xaxony Silentshadow
12-31-04, 09:48 AM
When your daughter turns around and tells you, "Mom, you sound just like Grandma :frown "
When you...
Ah, screw this! I'm only 23. Excuse me while I go do something stupid before I'm too old to.