View Full Version : @#%$ mascots getting more ass than me!
09-16-03, 08:10 PM
Seriously, I can't understand why these corporate mascots are getting to do it with more hot women in a handful of commercials that I probably ever will in my life!
First, theres that stupid alien thing that sells CD players and digital cameras and whatnot. He has hot women throwing off their clothes and handcuffing themselves to him! And why? Cause he can apparently make a good mix CD?! Big @#%$ deal! You wanna know the secret to making a kickass mix CD? Make the first song Blur - Song 2, and make the last song Faith No More - Epic. Put whatever the @#%$ you want in the middle, childrens lullabyes, gregorian chants, it doesn't matter, it will still rock! See, I'm a @#%$ master! Wheres my @#%$ hot chicks!
And then we have the Levatt Blue bear. Not only does this bear get alot of women, he even gets a threesome! And why? Because he broke their @#%$ window! Do you know what I'd get if I broke someone window and decided to bring them a cooler of beer as an I'm Sorry? I'd probably get shot on their lawn and my cooler dragged into their house!
Its a @#%$ bear and an I don't know what. C'mon ladies, you don't need to be resorting to bestiality and whatever the hell you would call having sex with a weather balloon with eyes. I'm right here! Pick me instead! I'll make you mix CDs and smash your windows till you can't stand it anymore!!
Come on! @#%$!!! "Classes are not that out of balance -AbsorEQ"
09-16-03, 09:39 PM
Well with the walkman dude that one commercial where he's chained to some foreign chick some how reminds me of Star Wars where Leia is chained to Jabba.... nerd
EZ_Ewan aka nach0king
09-17-03, 03:39 AM
Mascot > Mangina
65 Gnome Rogue & Veteran on Bristlebane
09-18-03, 01:19 AM
The title of this rant mislead me bigtime. Guess I was expecting some highschool kid complaining about the school mascot.(not an actual animal someone who dresses like one at Football games)
09-18-03, 03:24 AM
I was wondering too. Lol. Time to go look for secondary employment as a football team's mascot. Mmmm...cheerleaders...
09-18-03, 05:00 AM
"You wanna know the secret to making a kickass mix CD? Make the first song Blur - Song 2, and make the last song Faith No More - Epic."
Ok, I have diagnosed your problem with Getting Some. Not to claim the status of a "real professional" in any one endeavor has been a small price to pay for the many benefits and pleasures of trespassing. ~Leo Lionni
09-18-03, 05:37 AM
Yeah I thought it was one of those "I'm a star player on the football team, but all the cheerleaders go after that guy that wears the funny horse suit on the sidelines instead!!" kinda rants - then I thought about the fact that there aren't many jocks that would post something like that on a forum that is even in some little tiny way associated with a nerdy PC game (Back In Black)
Delissandra Splitshadow - Veteran Deceiver of the Circle of Unseen Hands
Grandmaster Poisoner (250), Master Potter (191), Grandmaster Lush (200)
Cause I'm back on the track
And I'm beatin' the flack
Nobody's gonna get me on another rap
09-18-03, 05:38 AM
That was definately true with the Highschool Mascot at my school. It was a chick...and she was a slut.
Heard a fairly reliable rumor from multiple sources that she got trashed at a party and trained the whole football team.
I don't think that's the type of attention you're looking for though. gnmish.gearbinder.ring.warden.sullon.zek
What's the point of wearing your favorite rocketship underpants if nobody ever asks to see 'em?
09-18-03, 06:07 AM
Talk about taking one for the team.
09-18-03, 08:45 AM
More like taking 25 for the team...give or take...heh.
09-18-03, 10:17 AM
WTF people, derail much!
We're here to discuss how to murder that bear and skin him and wear his skin and eat his heart so I can become him! "Classes are not that out of balance -AbsorEQ"
09-18-03, 10:43 AM
But you still wouldn't get any chicks ...
I'm currently playing: P.N. 03
09-18-03, 10:58 AM
He'll get bear chicks!
Or an acid washed mullet-head who likes Faith No More. "They will come back, come back again, as long as the Red Earth rolls. He never wasted a tree or a leaf, why should he squander souls?"
09-18-03, 12:17 PM
On second though I don't think you'd become the Lebat bear ... much more likey the masturbating bear from Conan
09-18-03, 02:39 PM
god I can't believe you mentioned Blur and Faith No More in the same post
09-18-03, 02:43 PM
And no one could bear it if that happened...
09-18-03, 09:24 PM
Wow they must have really been n00bs if she managed to do all of them in one night, talk about a whole team of minute men.
09-18-03, 10:00 PM
My taste in music is good like a tub of good things. The End.
P.S. Masterbating bear is a real american hero! "Classes are not that out of balance -AbsorEQ"
09-22-03, 02:23 PM
Not if she does 2 at a time, half the time.
Quote:Come on! @#%$!!!
cracked me up for some reason
09-23-03, 06:32 AM
So...did the team win or lose?
09-23-03, 10:16 AM
Um...well...the first guy in the 'game' won IMHO.
All the rest of them lost...as far as I'm concerned.
Oh, or were you talking about the actual sports event?
09-24-03, 01:37 AM
Just when you thought being a third-string cornerback couldnt get any worse.