View Full Version : The Perfect Girl...
12-16-03, 02:13 AM
I work with this girl that I find Really Really attractive, no I mean REALLY attractive. It got me wondering, I mean shes hot and all but wtf is Soooooooooooooooooo special about her, while I pondered this I was listening to my mp3 player, I will be listing some songs I was listening to at the time.
I asked myself what are the things that drive men nuts, the things that are pretty universal.
Eyes, she has incredible eyes
Smile, Christ her smile is dangerous, all those cheesy things they say about an amazing smile, to true.
Exotic Accent, Check
Exotic Girl, Check (shes from somalia)
Great Body, Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Delicious (or so I assume)
Mutual Attraction, yeah you know what I mean, when its clear that you are both on the same wave length.
Shes tall, about 5'10" not that I really care that much about height but it is ocasionaly nice to actually kiss the girl your'e screwing WHILE your'e screwing her. (I'm 6'3")
Intelligent, ah yeah shes got that intuative kind of mind that sees where you are going when you have hardly started talking.
so yeah there I am (Reverend Horton Heat, Nurture My Pig) getting my mac on,(James Brown, Sex Machine) flirting up a storm (Chili Peppers, Special Secret Song) shes smiling, being pretty flirty back at me (Ween, Let Me Lick Your @#%$) when it hits me, not like an epiphany hits you (Southern Culture on the Skids, Walk Like a Camel) more like an angry fist hits you out of nowhere, This Lovely Creature, (FishBone, Bonin in the Bone Yard) This Damn Fine woman that I am so sprung on, (Garbage, Slept Together) Naked Funk, Jenny @#%$ Lately) is Muslem.
No not oh my god shes a terrorist! more like Dude What are you thinking? shes really Muslem,Head Scarf, long sleeved shirts, long skirts only, no skin to skin contact exept with her husband and so on. She is the kind of girl the Catholic church wishes they were popping out of catholic schools across the country. I dont have a problem with her religeon so much and I have a problem getting married, I am looking at moving out of state soon, I dont have time for a long term relationship let alone one thats as serious as I forsee this one getting.
so basically after a long period of being broke and depressed over a ton of B.S. I am ready to get on with things and the first Hottie I find is a member of a very strict Religeon while I am somewhere between devout Athiest and vaugely agnostic who really just wants a nice girl to see if I cant put her into a state of orgasmic bliss 12 times a night.
oh yeah I almost forgot
ok I am really just hoping somone logs on and tells me Muslem Girls make Catholic School girls look like Mrs. Cleaver in comparasion but I aint getting my hopes up.
12-16-03, 03:10 AM
You only need to do two things to find out.
1) Convert to Islam.
2) Marry her.
EZ_Jassy of Povar
12-16-03, 04:14 AM
Quote:Shes tall, about 5'10" not that I really care that much about height but it is ocasionaly nice to actually kiss the girl your'e screwing WHILE your'e screwing her. (I'm 6'3"
Kinda lost my sympathy with this statement. You went from sounding sincere to sounding like all ya wanted to do was "do her in the pooper" (ok, had to throw that reference in there, sorry )
12-16-03, 05:31 AM
It sounds to me like The Perfect Girl is too good for the likes of you.
12-16-03, 05:34 AM
If you like her that much, you'll get over it and yourself and stop being a dink.
12-16-03, 05:49 AM
Good luck. gnmish.gearbinder.ring.warden.sullon.zek
'Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest... Honestly.'
12-16-03, 07:18 AM
Quote:It sounds to me like The Perfect Girl is too good for the likes of you.
The perfect girl wouldn't pay attention to superficial people who's in it for the nookie. If that's all she's in for then she'll end up using and abusing you, you'll come back here bitching about it in a few months, therefore, proving that she's imperfect.
12-16-03, 07:38 AM
Is she married? Take her out on a date, find out how orthodox she is.
12-16-03, 07:42 AM
Wow.. And this would be why Women think all guys are pigs.
She might be 'Hot' but if that is all your basing her being 'perfect' off of, you are going to have a lot of relationships with very shallow self centered women before you find the one that is right.
Does that mean you Can't find a 'perfect' women that is smokin hot? Hell no, but FFS get to know them first. The simple fact is in my experience many great looking women are used to their looks carrying them, and as such do not develope many social skills, and quite bluntly are complete bitches. You have to actually get to know them, go on a few dates, actually care about the woman, and see if she cares about you, not just skip straight to hey lets have sex.
She may be Muslin, you may not be, does that mean you 2 could never have anything? I'll admit it makes the prospect of a 1 night fling or a relationship like it sounds like you want seem inprobable, but if you 2 dated for a while and there were mutual feelings I doubt religion would stand in the way of love, as much as it may stand in the way of lust.
In any case best of luck.
Shanar's Fantastical Gear!
12-16-03, 07:52 AM
Soundtrack to this rant now available at Best Buy and other fine stores.
12-16-03, 08:05 AM
Quote:It sounds to me like The Perfect Girl is too good for the likes of you.
Welcome to the twenty first century people, please leave your puritan believes at the door. IMO there is no way you can have a perfect relationship without physical intimacy. You may preach to the contrary all you want, but every single guy is with me even if they dont admit it, and quite frankly, those girls who admit it are usually much happier in relationships because the guy is not all strained.
12-16-03, 08:14 AM
If you like her enough to even think about asking her out, go ahead and ask her out.
You'll find out if the attraction is mutual and you'll be able to stop obsessing over whether or not it is. (Back In Black)
Delissandra Splitshadow - Marauder of Clan X
Grandmaster Poisoner (250), Master Potter (191), Grandmaster Lush (200)
12-16-03, 08:20 AM
Jebus, from most of these replies I get the feeling no one's dating anymore, just going straight from "I think I like you" to the alter.
/agree with what DP said.
Not to claim the status of a "real professional" in any one endeavor has been a small price to pay for the many benefits and pleasures of trespassing. ~Leo Lionni
EZ_Jassy of Povar
12-16-03, 08:25 AM
Bleh.... I wouldn't want to have to date in this day and age. *shudder*
....20 years with the same woman, and still in love with the girl I met while we both were stationed in Iceland....
&quot;I can imagine a no more rewarding career. And any man who may be asked in this century what he did to make his life worthwhile, I think can respond with a good deal of pride and satisfaction: 'I served in the United States Navy.'&quot; -- JFK
12-16-03, 08:35 AM
Quote:IMO there is no way you can have a perfect relationship without physical intimacy.
I never said you could, I agree, "Physical Attraction" or Intimacy are important.
However Important does not = Foundation.. Once the thrill of it being new fades there needs to be something there for that relationship to exist on other than just sex or it will not work.
Edit : Removed Sig
Edited by: Shanar at: 12/16/03 10:41 am
12-16-03, 08:39 AM
12-16-03, 08:50 AM
I agree with you Shanar, I just took up an argument against those who said that he's a pig for wanting to copulate with her.
12-16-03, 09:56 AM
Using the word copulate when not working for Discovery channel = Pig.
12-16-03, 10:01 AM
I dunno, somehow 'copulating' sounds a bit better than 'screwing', but not much...
First things first tho... ask the girl out!
There are some very attractive muslim girls at the universities up in Berkeley.
12-16-03, 10:40 AM
People agree with me.. It's the end of the world.. :P
Go with "making sweet sweaty monkey looove". It's corny enough that no one can take it seriously yet gets your intentions across rather pointedly.
It's sort of like if Amelie were dressed as a nun, right?
12-16-03, 11:12 AM
I dunno, last I checked, telling a girl you were "sprung on" her wasn't construed as cute.
12-16-03, 11:26 AM
Reading comprehension is your friend
"I am looking at moving out of state soon, I dont have time for a long term relationship let alone one thats as serious as I forsee this one getting"
And please note, I am simply being honest when I flat out tell you yes I want to jump her bones. if you have a problem with that lvl of bluntness I dont know what to say,
maybe you will notice the part where I realise how incompatable my desires are with hers? maybe?
and yeah I have talked to her alot, shes both incredible and more than a bit strange, there are some things you just dont talk about with her (sex, in any form i.e. you could explain what vasectomy means but when she found out where you were going with the explanation the conversation is over.)
if anyone of you can tell me honesty you are currently dating/married to a woman or man that you had no physical attraction to when you met I will congradulate you on hooking up with what ever rich idiot it is you have found.
its the rant hall let me rant.
and yes damnit I would love to do her in the friggin pooper. The bible. you don't realy know where it came from. How do U know that the origonal catholic church or who ever didn't just make it up 2 gain control of a generation of monkeys thriving on chaos. Perhaps god does exist ,but maybe U should try 2 figure it out on your own. Stop beliving he's that rubber bending all knowing fairy tale that serves everyones selfesh ,self gratifing reasons. maybe your pastor, priest, bishop or what ever is at your house screwing the woman of your dreams while you're out buying cigs.
THINK ABOUT IT! BITCH.
there was an orthodox jewish girl I liked a few years ago. I think I know what you mean.
12-16-03, 12:46 PM
Well, I guess I didnt see that part there.
Oh well, youre f*cked. Go buy another bottle of Jergen's.
Quote:She may be Muslin, you may not be, does that mean you 2 could never have anything?
This is a moot point now, but it would depend on if shes a Bombay Muslim or a Riyadh Muslim, know what I mean? Muslim men are generally allowed to marry non Muslim women, but the thought is that a Muslim woman married to a non Muslim man wont receive the proper amount of 'respect' for her religion in the union, and it is doomed to failure. All from what I understand, I could be wrong.
12-16-03, 12:48 PM
Quote:Muslim men are generally allowed to marry non Muslim women, but the thought is that a Muslim woman married to a non Muslim man wont receive the proper amount of 'respect' for her religion in the union, and it is doomed to failure. All from what I understand, I could be wrong.
That's all propaganda - Muslim men just don't want Muslim women marrying anybody but them.
12-16-03, 01:10 PM
Thats a big D-Uh, good buddy.
12-16-03, 02:20 PM
I don't mean to sound snobby or sanctamonious or something, but frankly I really wonder what's up with the world when someone, who at the first mention of religion in a subject goes off ranting about how Catholics have created the Bible, spelling-"you"-everyone's-favorite-way and calling others closed minded, can have been in previous relationships while I know wonderful people who are thoughtful and funny but have never even been kissed. Wow, that was a long sentence. where anger is big and fueled by hydrogen
12-16-03, 02:46 PM
Honest question for the female posters in this thread:
Why the hostility towards slang words related to sexuality?
Are we really restricted to "Beautiful", I love you", and "Make Love"? People are pigs if they use words like Smokin Hot, Bang, Screw, etc.?
If you criticize people for saying outright disrespectful stuff (e.g. "My Biatch, Suck my @#$%, Whats up Sluts, etc.)... well, Im right there with ya. Disrespect is bad.
But I fail to see how its disprespecting anyone to use the sort of language people have been attacked for using in this thread. Veda Kai'Rin
12-16-03, 03:46 PM
When you say "female posters" and "Why the hostility" are you refering to anything more than the one (non-hostile) post in which one female chose copulating over screwing? Out of all the female replies, I didn't see any other mentions of the topic, hostile or otherwise. What comments are you reading?
Quote:its the rant hall let me rant.
you new here??
if so, then understand that very rarely do people get so lucky as to rant without feedback.. Its part of the process.. its all good..
12-16-03, 06:49 PM
Christ on a pony, you are making atheists look bad with the crap you are spewing. What the hell ever happened to tolerance?
On a side note, talking dirty doesn't faze me. Sometimes it gets better results =p
And I have to agree with boot disk btw, every word.
12-16-03, 07:59 PM
I conveniently skipped the second page because it's 5am, but jebus, what happened to people around here? Are you all such idealistic puritans now that you think it's wrong for the guy to see it as a serious drawback that the girl has a very different religion from him, one that most likely even prohibits sex before marriage?
I'll say it straight out, a girl would have to be pretty freaking super fantastic perfect to make me interested in doing the "no sex before marriage thing". What's wrong with that? She'd have to be even better to make up for the problems vastly differing religions will cause if I marry her.
One note though, if you do ask her out, make sure you know how to pronounce/spell her religion - she's a Muslim, not a Muslem or Muslin.
12-16-03, 10:56 PM
Elerion, you told me you'd wait till we were married to take it in the pooper.
12-16-03, 10:58 PM
her religeon isnt the issue I have a problem with, shes fantastic all the way around, its more like MY religeon. really with the music listed and the language I use something, just something tells me I would be less than perfect for her,
that and its really obvious we have different ideas about whats going on here. I mean I have dated women without sleeping with them, thats not even the thing, I find a girl who is really attractive on a ton of levels and I CANT spend the time to find out if shes the real thing or not...well I could try and turn on the charm and get her to move to SanFransisco with me, er maybe not.
sorry for the less than clear post.
and Aidden Wtf I have been here for years or did you miss the Diabalein=Elegence post and former sig.
oh yeah that sig in the second post its a bit out of line lol never meant to use it.
12-17-03, 03:16 AM
Its different for a devout atheist to date someone who strongly believes in religon than it is for people from two diffrent religons. The devout(agnostics and soso atheist dont count) atheist feels like they are basically dating someone who believes in the easter bunny.
So if you really are strong in your atheisim its prolly doomed.
12-17-03, 03:58 AM
I BELIEVE IN THE EASTER BUNNY!
12-17-03, 06:00 AM
Bah, why worry about your moving away and whatnot?
Ask her out anyway. Even if it's a short-lived romance you'll at least have had that. Or, you can always wonder what might have happened... but then again, I'm the kind of person who prefers taking a chance when it comes to matters of the heart.