Here begins my first rant about women in the safehouse. I apologize in advance:
I dropped out of the dating game about 9 months ago. It was probably for the best. Every relationship I've had (even the ones that lasted no longer than a day) I've managed to get kicked around in some way, shape, form, or fashion. I'm not naieve enough to think that I don't hold fault for letting myself get kicked around, but even still - you'd think that when you go into any relationship with the sole purpose of trying to make 'her' happy, at least one person could find it in her @#%$ heart to make an effort every once in a while.
My girlfriends have a really fun way of circling back around on me. About every time they come out of a bad relationship, I get one of those 3am drunk IMs and end up having one of those 3am drunk conversations.
Her:"Hey, long time no see."
Her:"How've you been? Good I hope."
Me:"Yep, how about you?"
Her:"I'm doing good."
Me:"Still boning anything with a heartbeat?"
Yeah, so I'm bitter. You would be too. It feels good to vent some grievances to people whom I really don't care if I ever speak to again. Well, one of my old girlfriends started IMing me again and actually sucked me into a phone conversation or two. We didn't exactly hit it off again, but she seems to have changed in the one measurable way that an ex-girlfriend can change. You see, she was my token "stoner girlfriend." The one that started off well, but fizzled in 3 weeks because she cared more about pot than she did about me. And now to my surprise, she's actually quit the reefer. Will wonders never cease?!
So she and I are talking and we've actually made it back to the stage of "friends" at one level or another. So one night, she was drunk and I was operating on 16 hours of jetlag (which is almost as bad). We were having a conversation and she suggests that when I come back in town, we should hook up again. Not have a relationship mind you, just fsck buddies. I dismissed it as her being drunk, but the next day, she IMs me again and tells me that she's serious.
I think about it and my initial thoughts are "Hell yah!" This girl is easily the hottest girl I've ever dated, and we never really got to do much since pot isnt exactly an aphrodesiac. So I start talking to her a little more and suddenly that little "friend" aura has dissipated. It seems like the underlying sexual tension was all that bound the two of us together to a point where I could hold up a conversation.
I still want to see her in town, but I'm afriad that I'll look and/or feel shallow as hell if I hook up with this girl for whom I have little more than a physical attraction. I guess what I really need is just for one of you safehouse goons to tell me "stop your griping and do her in the pooper." Thanks for listening.
Quote:"and we never really got to do much since pot isnt exactly an aphrodesiac."
Yeah, I know it works that way for some people. She was one of those stoners that just sits on a couch and stares at the floor. Could never really initiate anything because I worried that it'd feel like I was raping a (really hot) comatose body.
To Aidden: Yeah, that became very apparent. That's why I've been dry-spelling it for the last 9 months. Just sucks that trying to be chivalrous gets you used. It pisses me off that there are actually good girls out there that get screwed over by guys who used to be good people - but "fell from grace" due to selfish girls. (Don't get me wrong ladies, I'm sure this happens on the opposite side of the scale... I'm just speaking from what I know.)
Its a wretched snowball effect. (to quote you, "Back off punsters")
To Hummerlein: Not every night, more like every other night, but the problem was I'd only get to see her about once a week, even though I planned to see her a lot more. Only about a third of the plans went through - she usually got baked and forgot.
To her credit though, I do think she's been through some attrition. Her recent ex-boyfriend did the same thing to her that she did to me. We were talking about him and she said "I don't even know why you still talk to me after I acted that way." So I'm not all too bitter about it. The main problem is just that I don't feel like I would be talking to her if I wasn't just so damned attracted to her. Edited by: Aurarier at: 3/25/04 12:55 pm
cause she has really nice ti....er.... I mean I'm not making excuses. She treated me like balls, and I'm not about to put her in a position to do that again. All I'm saying is that I feel like she's grown in the past year, at least enough for me to check in on her and see her face to face...especially if there might be ass involved.
I don't know, I have the uncanny ability to convince myself that I'm making a compelling argument and then act stupid because of it... am I being a dumbass?
You seem to be having two distinctly seperate trains of thought. On the one hand you claim to not want to get involved and it's just for sex - which would be fine on it's own. But then, as Aidden pointed out, you keep making excuses for her and how she's changed, which suggests you are concerned with the type of person she may be now to have a relationship with.
Just set it straight in your own head what your expectations are here before you get into it. If it really is going to be just a casual, sex once in a while thing, then nevermind analyzing whether she's changed or not and stop justifying it - it doesn't matter. Just do it. If you really expect it to be more than that though, then admit it to yourself and think it through before you get involved. Edited by: Kuurus at: 3/26/04 4:15 am
Hmm... you make a good point Kuu... through a conduit of Aidden's good point. I'll have to meditate on it, and by meditate, I mean play video games until my brain's numb to the world, for then I shall reach true clarity.
Moving off of the topic of my women troubles... uhhmmm.... how's the weather? Ooh Ooh! I got one! Reality TV... I swear to god, if one more new show comes out that involves a bunch of attractive, catty, shallow, vapid action figures put into roles that are supposed to be cooky, fun, and innovative, I'm just going to scream.
The only reality TV show for which I do not think the producers should be stoned to death while wearing hats designed by Stevie Wonder and dresses designed by whoever the hell made the wardrobe for Sex and the City (/shudder) is the new Gilligan's Island show... 10 points for concept. When the retribution comes, they shall be spared the brunt of my wrath and shall be made into slaves for my think-tank slave camps!
LOW! Fear for the coming of the geek-prophet is nigh! Fire shall rain from the heavens and blood shall seep forth from the ground. GAIN industries shall burn in the fires of a thousand hells and GENE SHALLOT shall be flayed upon stakes of human flesh and bone!
Quote:LOW! Fear for the coming of the geek-prophet is nigh! Fire shall rain from the heavens and blood shall seep forth from the ground. GAIN industries shall burn in the fires of a thousand hells and GENE SHALLOT shall be flayed upon stakes of human flesh and bone!
Sweet baby @#%$ what the @#%$ kind of psychotropic drugs are you on?