I am curious. We had a breastfeeding discussion a while back about breastfeeding in public. I am having a discussion about this thread on another forum about when is breastfeeding abuse.

For those of the link-impaired, the aforementioned thread talks about a mother breastfeeding her child of 21 months. Trick is: she has no milk. There is no nutritional value being derived, and the child had not breastfed for 17 months because of a lack of milk. The mother wanted to start nursing again because she wanted some sort of "bond."

Is this abuse? I do know from reading some forums that some women derive sexual pleasure from nursing their children (which I think is incredibly sick). I tend to think it's abuse, but I am wondering if my opinion is skewed because I haven't "been there and done that." Some people have said that, because I don't have or want children I have absolutely no right to comment on the issue. But I think if there's no milk, it's not actually being breastfed, and thus it's abuse. Is there an exception?

Also, at what age should children be weaned? I have heard from as soon as possible, to hearing of children who have been breastfed until they were 7 years old. There is a line in the sand somewhere, and I am pretty sure it's before age 7. My brother-in-law apparently was breastfed until he was 5 or 6, and he said he remembers doing it. I'd be very interested in the opinions of "normal people" (with a great variety of amusing opinions) on what exactly is normal?

Thanks. I appreciate any insight you can give me.

I just breast fed about 20 minutes ago...

... oh wait, that isnt what you meant is it?

I knew aidden was a 2 year old child. Finally proof.

My wife breastfed our youngest 2 until 6 months. Basically, a good rule of thumb is: When they get teeth, take 'em off the teet.

a family I know the mother BF'd her first daughter till she was about two.. and then the next daughter came along.... and she'd been feeding this one she's about a year now.. and they are expecting a thrid one in about 5 months

If the kid is old enough to unhook the bra on their own, its time to stop.

When it's a dude.

Once the milk stops, it's time for the husband to take over.

My Brother in law ( my sisters husbands brother that is) has a little boy just shy of 3. Two weeks ago we were having a family cook out and they had came over. They fixed him a plate but he refused to eat. After everyone had finished he ran up to her while she was sitting down and pulled her shirt up in front of everyone going "milk mommy milk"

Wasn't there a thing on House (yes, the tv show) that said breast milk really won't protect the baby past 15 months, meaning all the nutrients and what not is inneffective? It's still there, and all, but it just becomes useless to the baby.

Of course...I could be wrong...about everything, on this, lol. I do know that it was on House...I don't watch much else.

The only thing Ive heard about the matter is that breast feeding can cause teeth to come in crooked or buck-toothed. Thats nothing too serious, but who wants to pay for braces these days?

I can't think of how gettin some nip' could ever be considered abuse, except on the breast itself.

I just never shared with the kid...

I believe you're short changing the kid, when you hold back the childs development/learning because the parent wants a closer bond.

Wouldn't go so far as abuse, but bad parenting yes.

I believe (it's been 2 years since we had an infant in our house) doctors recommend 6 months now. That's enough time to pass along the mother's antibodies which is the greatest benefit of breastfeeding. The doctors refuse to state "normal" maximums however because every family is different. Most people I know have rarely made it the full year. Once they start eating more solids, breast milk doesn't supply anything extra to the child other than "bonding."

I hate to be a parent that dictates what others do, but I will say a year and a half maximum but even that would make my sensibilities uneasy/creeped out. I'd say if the child can ask for it in a complete sentence, they're probably overdue to ween.

The World Health Organisation recommends 2 years. The AMA recommend at least 1 year. Most american women have stopped before 4 months. Most babies get their first teeth round 5-6 months.

I breastfed for 2 years with my first child and 16 months with my second.

The milk is as nutritious at 2, 3, 4 years as it was when it first started. The composition changes over time though.

Breast milk isn't designed to be the only source of nutrition after about 6 months, but its generally accepted that it should be the main source of milk till at least 1 year. Most women can maintain an adequate milk supply well past 1 year. Breast milk doesn't go off in the breast. It isn't even actually stored there for any significant time, it is made constantly in response to the demand of the infant feeding.

As far as it being abuse, that is really not something you can categorically state as to when is too long. In some countries they feed well past 3. In Australia where I am, its not very common past 1 year, but more so than in the USA.

Also, breastfeeding does NOT affect teeth/jaw development, in fact studies have shown a direct link between silicone nipples and jaw development problems. I can get the study link if you care enough to want to know more. It was this single issue that caused me to go from "sure I will breastfeed if it is easy" to " I will breastfeed come hell or high water" because it was something I could do that would ensure I was doing the absolute best I was capable of in one aspect of my parenting.

Breast milk does supply antibodies for the entire time it is fed. It doesn't stop working. It is best described as a living substance, in that it has actively beneficial enzymes and no other milk substitute comes close to it.

Breast feeding though, is not for all mothers or families, nor is extended nursing, say past 4 months. I am not a breastfeeding nazi, I am more interested in healthy mothers and babies than statistics and nursing sit-ins. Hope that helps abit.

Well not having milk... weird... abuse... dunno... but it is weird... I suspect it is like a living pacifier but like I said... weird!

If she had milk who cares how long they get milk... I doubt it last past the time they (the kids) become socially aware.

If anyone is getting anything sexual in nature it is wrong but I doubt that is the case here from reading the other board, but then again I doubt if Tummy was, she would admit it out in public!

Thanks for the firsthand account Tamaelia!

As for the WHO recommendation, I'm betting there is a HUGE cultural rift between the US and the rest of the world. In some parts of the world it makes more sense to continue. Fat America isn't under the same economic/nutritional conditions as others. Perhaps that is why it is such a stigma over here.

Also, regarding antibodies. I was a bit vague in my post. I know our pediatricians had told us that is a great boost for newborns. But the babies natural defense mechanisms kick in full tilt around the 6 month mark. Antibodies from mom become more and more unnecessary.

Anyhow, not trying to be preachy, just tossing things out there for the sake of discussion. Ultimately, I think the family unit is more important than social stigma. Parenting is a situational process, not a rigorous tik list.

Wow this thread is a gold mine.

Yeah, basically, that's what I was trying to get at. Of course, I have no experience in this and all that, but was trying to help. =)

Least I learned stuff for future reference in this post, lol.

Nocte, You are right in your assessment of how the USA fits in with regard to the WHO recommendations. The WHO rec's are designed to encompass the very poor countries of the world as well as yours and mine. The reasons that it is benefical past 6 months are still valid, though many women are able to supply their child with similar nutrition. The US Surgeon General recommendation is 1 year. The link contains pictures of women breast feeding, so I can't believe I actually have to type this but anyway, it may be NSFW (http://www.womenshealth.gov/Breastfe....cfm?page=home )


Kinare, as far as deriving sexual pleasure from breastfeeding, I would say that is probably unlikely but I obviously can't speak for every woman. Nursing isn't unpleasant but it can hurt, you are usually very tired and have about a million things waiting for you to do. I certainly didn't find the experience sexually stimulating LOL I did find it very rewarding that I was the sole provider of my baby's nutrition and was amazed at how my body can make that happen.

Also, it is possible to re-lactate. It is very difficult and usually the only women who would go to the effort to try to are those who have adopted a very young infant. Some mums who stopped breastfeeding and regretted it have also attempted to re-lactate. It can be done but it is very time-intensive and I think for most folks its not worth the reward vs the effort required.

Having just browsed the forum you linked to Kinare, I would have to draw the conclusion that those women seem to be attention seeking. I don't know if I would call it sexual abuse but I don't see how re-establishing breastfeeding after such a long break would help restore a mother-child bond. That bond can be built in many other ways, not just through breastfeeding. Seems more like a statement to me.

Well, scandinavian countries aren't exactly poverty ridden and starved, yet I believe doctors here recommend children are breast fed at least 1 year. For the latter part of that year they obviously supplement with other food.

I think I was partially breast fed until about 18 months, and I'm one smart and sexy devil, so I guess it works.

My mother, who is the queen of reading trashy news, told me about an article where a woman contacted La Leche League because she was deriving sexual pleasure from breastfeeding and wanted help. LLL contacted the police, who arrested her and charged her with sexual abuse. Again, this is my mother, and it could have been some story related to Bat Boy for all I know....

I'm always a day late and a dollar short, and with a newborn I'm not posting as much right now. But Tamaelia said what I wanted to say anyways.